Sunday Night Blues by Bobbi McGee


 Many people will not understand what I’m about to share, but that is okay because the ones who get it, “get it.” It’s Sunday, it’s sunny, it’s blue skies with blue in my heart. Why? He is outside doing his walk around, greasing the fifth wheel, thumping his tires, and carrying his bag out. I’m in the house meal prepping for his leave and watching out the window as he prepares to leave home…again. I know it’s not only me that dreads Sunday and is on edge. I work to remain positive and smile but sometimes, like today, it just breaks through. I’d like to say I make the perfect restful environment for him to prepare to sleep long enough to get up at 2am and leave out but sometimes my emotions get the best of me and I’ll pick a fight or just shut down entirely, say nothing and feel numb. I think these various responses are coping mechanisms for being in love with a man who gets paid to leave me. I know many couples struggle with excessive time apart, truckers, military, tow boaters, traveling sales reps, musicians, rodeo cowboys, they all live this in one way or another. Sunday’s prep him for his week out, at this stage in his career the month away or three weeks away are turning into a week away at a time so, it’s not near as bad but after so many years of it, it makes eventual retirement seem welcomed. Do truckers over the road ever really retire? I long ago accepted that this is who he is, not just what he does. My prepping his food is a way for my “love” to be with him and care and nourish him even though we are apart. It saves him time and money and keeps him from living on value meals and energy drinks. When evening comes he will already be asleep, and the house will be quiet. When I wake up the drive will look big and empty but my heart is still full. This is the hard part, living it over and over again… 

I often say “it’s better to be the one leaving instead of the one being left,” but I don’t think either role is an easy one. America wants the shelves full, but they don’t truly understand the sacrifice it takes to make that happen. Well I do and we will be discussing that and many more things about the trucking lifestyle in future posts to come. I’m glad we are on this journey together. 3 million plus trucks on the road today and most of them are leaving someone they care about behind. It’s a part of “doing this deal.” You better develop a Hard Shell.


https://youtu.be/Vg5u2aQpyOA?si=3acJTZ9MwRFO9ynp

Click on this link to hear “The Hard Part,” by Long Haul Paul Music available on YouTube. 

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